a relationship that just keeps on getting better
Everyone come, take a piece of me, play with it like dough, and give it back to me after u have had your share of fun.
"dude you made the wrong choice :
"i wish u actually knew her. then you wouldnt have"
"what you think she is. she is not, thats just what you want her to be"
"no no..dont get me wrong here. i am sure"
But was i really ?? actually, am i really ??
Lets think about it,
summer me and pravi got together, it could have easily happend, coz pravi was lonely and insecure then. Came of a bad relationship. Was hurt. I hadnt screwed up in her life yet. Was the only guy left out of the 5-6 candidates who took their turns first. Plus i kind of feel like she just said yes, thinking its gonna be fun.
Fall semester, like she says was miserable for her. She was like a lamb and all. And obviously i had all those issues with pravi not being a good gf.
Spring semester. She tells me it was better. But that can be mistaken, because she is using fall and summer as a frame of reference. So relatively she was better off, but on the absolute scale she wasnt really happy.
summer. Acc, to her was the worst time of her life, even worse than freshman year.
so all in all, it can be very possible that pravi never actually loved me. She actually never really felt a part of this relationship. She was never into it. But i think once she realised that she never was in it, she tried, and obviously things didnt work out.
Why am i so surprised that she doesnt miss me right now ? why am i shocked that she can be perfectly happy in her life without me ?
When if i think about it, she was never into me.
I was a fool who didnt read the situation. I was just relieved and massively happy that she was finally with me. I never realised that she might not have wanted to.
That would explain all the distance that she is comfortable with right now.
"Vikram you were good as a friend, not as a bf" ."i am not comfortable with you that close"
All the lies, all the things that she hid, all the texts sent behind my back,
creating a new number just to text anuraag.......that explains everything.
now i am sorry, dear mr. heart, that i didnt take care of it. you see i ended up handing you over to her, and she had no idea what to do with you coz she never really wanted it. So she ended up hurting it.
LIFE FUCKING SUCKS.
IT SUCKS SUCKS SUCKS....what on earth was i thinking when i thought she is into me ??
she clearly isnt.......a small town guy with zero personality a huge ego and a hot temper...WHAT THE FUCK IS THERE TO LIKE ???
FIRST TIME IN MY LIFE, I TOOK A CHANCE WITH HURT AND BITCH WAS I HURT !!!
you see you can never let your guard down. NEVER. DONT DO THAT SHIT AGAIN IF IT IS POSSIBLE.
HERES WHAT YOU ARE GONNA DO :
1) try nd be a decent bf for as long as she needs to decide she finally needs to break it.
2) dont do drama when she ends it with you.
3) go to your own little corner and cry like a bitch. HURT YOURSELF. HURT YOURSELF FOR LETTING YOURSELF DOWN.
4) vow on the name of God, never ever to love again. Never ever to consider feelings again.
She will end it soon. I have nothing to offer to her. No hope of a better life, no money , no class, no standard nothing. THE ONLY THING I HAD WAS BUCKET LOADS OF LOVE, AND MISSY THINKS "maybe i dont need it"...HOW CUTE PRAVI !!!
I cant believe this is what its headed into. Cant believe i am the one who is getting dumped. Cant go through that a third time now. wanted to be a hero and save her life, but as fate wud have it i am the one drowning.
I have never loved someone more, nor will i ever allow myself to.
I am gonna be that sad person, who walks up on the street into a fruit shop, runs into pravi and her husband, with their baby in a pram,. I will smile awkwardly. Run away from the scene and go kill some humans coz i wud be mad and sad and frustrated with life. The worst thing is i am picturing shyaam, shoumo and nimit as the husbands right now. Once you give a face to your imaginations, the thing becomes more worse.
Pravi, this is SO SO SO SO UNFAIR.
i wish i was that guy who felt love only when his penis was inside you. Things wudd have been so much simpler. No hurt nothing. Just wud have had to find a new pussy to bang on.
BUT NO THIS SHIT I COMPLICATED. and the worst part is IT IS OUT OF MY HANDS.
Everyone come, take a piece of me, play with it like dough, and give it back to me after u have had your share of fun.
"dude you made the wrong choice :
"i wish u actually knew her. then you wouldnt have"
"what you think she is. she is not, thats just what you want her to be"
"no no..dont get me wrong here. i am sure"
But was i really ?? actually, am i really ??
Lets think about it,
summer me and pravi got together, it could have easily happend, coz pravi was lonely and insecure then. Came of a bad relationship. Was hurt. I hadnt screwed up in her life yet. Was the only guy left out of the 5-6 candidates who took their turns first. Plus i kind of feel like she just said yes, thinking its gonna be fun.
Fall semester, like she says was miserable for her. She was like a lamb and all. And obviously i had all those issues with pravi not being a good gf.
Spring semester. She tells me it was better. But that can be mistaken, because she is using fall and summer as a frame of reference. So relatively she was better off, but on the absolute scale she wasnt really happy.
summer. Acc, to her was the worst time of her life, even worse than freshman year.
so all in all, it can be very possible that pravi never actually loved me. She actually never really felt a part of this relationship. She was never into it. But i think once she realised that she never was in it, she tried, and obviously things didnt work out.
Why am i so surprised that she doesnt miss me right now ? why am i shocked that she can be perfectly happy in her life without me ?
When if i think about it, she was never into me.
I was a fool who didnt read the situation. I was just relieved and massively happy that she was finally with me. I never realised that she might not have wanted to.
That would explain all the distance that she is comfortable with right now.
"Vikram you were good as a friend, not as a bf" ."i am not comfortable with you that close"
All the lies, all the things that she hid, all the texts sent behind my back,
creating a new number just to text anuraag.......that explains everything.
now i am sorry, dear mr. heart, that i didnt take care of it. you see i ended up handing you over to her, and she had no idea what to do with you coz she never really wanted it. So she ended up hurting it.
LIFE FUCKING SUCKS.
IT SUCKS SUCKS SUCKS....what on earth was i thinking when i thought she is into me ??
she clearly isnt.......a small town guy with zero personality a huge ego and a hot temper...WHAT THE FUCK IS THERE TO LIKE ???
FIRST TIME IN MY LIFE, I TOOK A CHANCE WITH HURT AND BITCH WAS I HURT !!!
you see you can never let your guard down. NEVER. DONT DO THAT SHIT AGAIN IF IT IS POSSIBLE.
HERES WHAT YOU ARE GONNA DO :
1) try nd be a decent bf for as long as she needs to decide she finally needs to break it.
2) dont do drama when she ends it with you.
3) go to your own little corner and cry like a bitch. HURT YOURSELF. HURT YOURSELF FOR LETTING YOURSELF DOWN.
4) vow on the name of God, never ever to love again. Never ever to consider feelings again.
She will end it soon. I have nothing to offer to her. No hope of a better life, no money , no class, no standard nothing. THE ONLY THING I HAD WAS BUCKET LOADS OF LOVE, AND MISSY THINKS "maybe i dont need it"...HOW CUTE PRAVI !!!
I cant believe this is what its headed into. Cant believe i am the one who is getting dumped. Cant go through that a third time now. wanted to be a hero and save her life, but as fate wud have it i am the one drowning.
I have never loved someone more, nor will i ever allow myself to.
I am gonna be that sad person, who walks up on the street into a fruit shop, runs into pravi and her husband, with their baby in a pram,. I will smile awkwardly. Run away from the scene and go kill some humans coz i wud be mad and sad and frustrated with life. The worst thing is i am picturing shyaam, shoumo and nimit as the husbands right now. Once you give a face to your imaginations, the thing becomes more worse.
Pravi, this is SO SO SO SO UNFAIR.
i wish i was that guy who felt love only when his penis was inside you. Things wudd have been so much simpler. No hurt nothing. Just wud have had to find a new pussy to bang on.
BUT NO THIS SHIT I COMPLICATED. and the worst part is IT IS OUT OF MY HANDS.
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